Cannes released all the movies that they're slated to show yesterday and also released the running time for all the films and for many of them it's the first time these times have been released. Probably one of the most talked about films premiering at Cannes is Quentin Tarantino's Inglorious Basterds ........and yes it's spelled wrong on purpose.....well the film is going to be a little over 2 hours and 40 minutes......which may make you say crap....I don't want watch a movie for nearly 3 hours, but I say why not? It's Tarantino's movie about a platoon of Jewish American soldiers are sent into Nazi occupied France and slaughter and torture Nazis. So nearly 3 hours of that, sounds pretty awesome. Oh yeah did I mention that Brad Pitt leads the platoon as Lt. Aldo Raine, a hillbilly jew from the mountains of Tennessee. And if all of that doesn't get you, then maybe your a Nazi.
Today brings us the release of the new Jean Claude Van Damme movie.....and yes I'm serious about this....it's an incredible movie. The film stars JCVD as himself in JCVD, a worn out past his prime international action star. The film starts out with JCVD in trial with his wife for custody over his child, and it shows that even the biggest stars are still just human. He's strapped for cash and is hoping to transfer some money in a local bank, when the bank gets held up, and the bank robbers decide to frame JCVD and make it look like he was robber...........The plot seems a little lax and it is in some parts, but Jean Claude delivers an actually moving and good performance. I never thought I'd say that in reference to him, but damnit the man deserves it. For those of you who are worried about him not kicking any ass in the movie; well don't fret he does a little bit, and he's also working with Dolph Lundgren right now on a new Universal Soldier.
I sat down and watched the latest adaptation of Palahniuk, Choke last night, and I'm a little torn. The performances from Sam Rockwell and Anjelica Huston really help elevate the film but it seems as though the film lacks the flair and wit of the source material. Though I'm quite sure in a few years people will look at the film with good regards, and it might even reach a bit of cult status.......then again who am I talk....I thought that a sequel Basic Instinct would be a good idea.......haha not really......but seriously.
Let's start the list off with the very first video game adaptation. They attempted to go all out to make sure that the film was successful, a good budget, a great cast, and a horrifically bad script. It seems that the sheer concept of it being a video game movie wasn't enough to draw in the crowds or appease the critics. Instead it created a monster that can't be destroyed or stopped.
Alright here we go Uwe Boll's first appearance on the list. Here's was a movie based on a video game that wasn't even that popular, and the movie w
Uwe Boll's second and defiently not last apperance is with 2003's horror flick House of the Dead. The video game itself is one of my all time favorite arcade games, but Uwe Boll decided that he wanted to ruin this franchise as well. The film lacks any type of plot, terrible acting, and looks like it was directed by a five year old blind child. Don't watch this please....actually I really feel as though I shouldn't even be acknowledging this film's existence, because I'm sure this is how Uwe Boll gets his power. He scours the internet looking for articles about how terrible his movies are by nerdy college kids who can't get half the money he gets to make an actually decent and intelligent film.....................and he laughs.
Do you remember Wing Commander that game from the early nineties? No, because neither do I. Regardless of the film's nonexistent audience the studio still decided to make the film in 1999, nearly five years after the last game's release. The plan was a sure fire plan.....put in a hot young cast, throw in some outer space battle scenes, and a ridiculously uncomfortable romance back story.........hmm sounds more like a Uwe Boll movie but no it was directed by Chris Roberts producer of such fine hits as The Punisher and Who's Your Caddy.........
The final film of this amazingly bad list is Uwe Boll's third appearance with 2005's Alone in the Dark. One of my biggest problems with this movie was Tara Reid. Apparently someone thought that it was believable to cast her as a scientist.......what the hell? Serously......Christian Slater's in it as well and I actually still like him so I'm not mention how terrible he really was in this movie. So the film's credibility is already shot, but Uwe Boll continues with Stephen Dorff who seems to be ripping off Iceman from Top Gun with his ridiculous performance. The film itself completely implodes not just from the terrible performances but from the overly serious plot that seemed as though it wanted to include some social commentary.......Jesus.
Frost/Nixon Frost/Nixon is the story and basically the post-watergate interviews between British reporter David Frost (Michael Sheen) and President Richard Nixon (Frank Langella). The film shows the behind the scenes of the interview and how Frost had to finance most of the project with his own money. The interview quickly escalates into a battle of wits between the two. The two stars both deliver Oscar caliber performances and deserve all the applaud they received during its release. The film itself was nominated for 5 Oscars (Director, Editing, Picture, Adapted Screenplay, Actor (Langella)) Ron Howard proves once again that he can direct heavy handed material and still make it an enjoyable film to watch.
I usually don't do reviews on T.V. shows, but occasionally I stumble across something so genius that I have to share it with the rest of you fine people. Today it's the Canadian made docu-com Trailer Park Boys . The show has been on since 2001 spawning 7 seasons and a feature film, but the show is still widely unknown in the states. The show revolves around the three central characters Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles. All of three reside in you guessed it a trailer park. The show is presented as a documentary crew following the three characters through their various misadventures around the trailer park including drug dealing, prison, kitties, partying, and Mr. Lahey(Trailer Park Supervisor). So get out right now and fucking get it.
Darren McGavin stars in this made for tv movie about Carl Kolchak an abrasive reporter who's attitude has gotten him fired from major newspapers and is now working for a small time paper in Las Vegas. He finally gets a break when local girls are found dead with all their blood drained, and Kolchak investigates what appears to be a Vampire. However despite his evidence his editor and the local police make sure that his story never runs. The film itself is so so, but McGavin brings great light to the movie, and despite the ridiculous story it still shows a lot of the behing the scene politics involved with Journalism.
Kirk Douglas stars as a down on his luck journalist who discovers a man trapped in a mine, and milks the situation, turning what should have been a six hour rescue operation into a six day long one. Kirk Douglas is wonderful as the titular star, bringing great depth to the character. The film work as a great commentary for journalistic ethics.
I realize that this really isn't that great of a movie, but it has Chevy Chase at his best. And that I believe makes up for everything. Chevy stars as Irwin Fletcher an Investigative Reporter for a L.A paper. Fletch has been working undercover on a local beach as a junkie trying to figure out who has been supplying all the drugs on the beach, when he stumbles across a conspiracy involving a local millionaire (Tim Matheson) and the chief of police (Joe Don Baker). Fletch uses different disguises and alter egos to solve the case, and makes the best jokes of his career on the way.
For a film that was a box office flop when it was first released, Citizen Kane surely overcame almost everyone's expectations and became one of the most acclaimed films of all time. With eerie parallels to William Randolph Hearst its no wonder why Hearst publicly thrashed the film, and the critics on his newspapers payroll certainly didn't help either. Regardless it shows the ultimate rise and fall of a man. A man who was once idealistic and unbreakable and how the corrupt world turned him into everything he despised. God I love this movie. If you haven't seen it I highly suggest seeing it right now.
Oh Wall-E.........the irony of this movie is overwhelming....it's one of the most blatant Disney propaganda films of all time, but the kicker is that it's good propaganda?
The movie that inspired a thousand hacks. The plotline is somewhat dated, but the fear is constant. It's a great example of control by corporations over media, and the those few who refuse to become oil in the machine.
Oil. Stephen Gaghan's oscar winning thriller is all about Texas Tea and those who control it all. It gives you a different perspective on everything about it.
The Last Rainforest.........in this amazing little piece of propaganda inhabitants of a rain forest attempt to save it from logging and pollution being caused by Hexxus. Do they save the forest? Will the world be safe from pollution and destruction??? Maybe in this world.
Keanu Reeves couldn't even destroy this classic cautionary tale about nuclear warfare. It's amazing a film made 58 years ago is just as powerful as the day it was released......actually thats just frightening.
Where to begin. This movie sucked. I really don't know how else to describe it. Gus Van Sant who I almost always enjoy, decided to do a shot for shot remake of the 1960 classic. WTF? That movie damn near perfection, and so they decide hey let's make it better. Well shoot everything the same but put it in color and let Vince Vaughn and Anne Heche star. That's all.
JESUS CHRIST. This movie pissed me off so much. Again I love Tim Burton, but f***ing hate this movie. Hey you know that guy Marky Mark
I'm only halfway through this list, and I already want to stab myself with a spoon.............Nicole Kidman. I'll give you yours in a minute, but for now I'll rant about this piece of shit they wanted to call a movie.
Nicole Kidman. What the hell happened to you?
Michael Caine's performance in the 1971 was a chilling deep and dark performance. Stallone's turn was instead a sleepy pay check seeking turn.
In what I consider the first of the Apatow gang production, Will Ferrell and company throw enough one liners and quotable quotes to remain in one's mind for years to come. I remember seeing this when it first came out. I literally pissed my pants from laughter. I had never seen a movie that was so incredibly idiotic and then at the same time be one of the smartest comdies in recent years.
Ok so I saw this movie right around three times when it came out. I really have to say that ten years from now people are going to look back at this film, and declare it one of the defining movies of the 2000's. And yes, I feel that it will have some of the same impact as Dazed and Confused and American Graffiti. If you don't believe me then just look at the current onslaught of the Apatow type productions.
This movie was what 2004's Starsky and Hutch meant to be. A comedy that really jumped the genre into action. The entire cast is phenomenal especially newcomer Danny McBride as Red. James Franco deserved the Golden Globe nomination no doubt, but I can't complain with the winner. Seth Rogen proved that he could be more then just a funny man, but as an action star as well. For example check out April 10th's Observe and Report, and his upcoming adaptation of the Green Hornet.
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When this movie came out I thought that it would be the end of the Bond frnachise. The film was a mediocre success at the box office. Luckily MGM realized their mistake, and took a step back, and reenvisioned the franchise with the culmination of the darker Casino Royale.
Hands down this movie had the most ridiculous and ludicrous plot line of all the Bond movies. Roger Moore seemed to sleep through the entire film. The only redeeming factor was the return of Richard Kiel as Jaws, but even the man with the strongest bite couldn't salvage this cheeky disaster.
It seems a lot of fan boys were upset with the lastest Bond movie. Following 2006's Casino Royale, the film stays with the gritty style and keeps on stirring clear of the hokey silly and ludicrous plot lines of old.
In 1998, the films American History X and Life is Beautiful were both generating a lot of buzz amongst Hollywood. The ironic thing being that they both revolve around anti-semitism but with one being about a jew facing anti-semitism, and the other about a former anti-semite who is trying to change his world view. As soon as the film American History X was released the critics were already raving about Ed Norton's performance. Ultimately it was Roberto Benigni who took home the gold. Still to this day many argue over this, proclaiming the ever present Hollywood politics as the killer of Norton's trip down the aisle.
Ok, sure this is one wasn't even suppose to have been made, and it was really just a ploy by the studio to cash in on the first movie. But I thank god they did, Because James Cameron delivered one of the best films of the nineties not only did it make over $200 million domestically, but it was also one of the best reviewed movies of the year. The film went to be nominated for six oscars and winning four. All of which were for technical and cosmetic achievements, and it was completely looked over for Best Picture or Best Director......sounds vaguely familiar to a recent film.
The film that launched Keanu Reeves career, and well the one that left Alex Winter behind. I will say though that Freaked which was directed by Winter is in my opinion a cult classic. I realize that it's not the best movie ever made, but how many other films have Napoleon, Lincoln, Genghis, and Socrates at a water park? I do believe enough said.
This 2006 futuristic comedy was directed by Mike Judge (Office Space, Beavis and Butthead). Despite a strong lead and having Judge's name the film wasn't released into theaters. It has quickly rised in popularity to a cult hit. It's basically our generation's Sleeper. Before this movie I had a extremly large distaste for Dax Shepard, but after his turn as an idiotic lawyer named Frito it was nothing but love.
This one was a little tricky. It also goes as one of my favorite dystopians but Im going to go ahead and put it on this one. Where do you really start with this movie? Terry Gilliam brought his usual neo-fantasy finesse that really raised this movie to the next bar. The entire cast is fantastic especially Brad Pitt, who earned his first Oscar nomination for his turn as the psychopathic (or is he?) Jeffrey Goines.
I'm sure this is going to upset a lot of fans, but I don't care. As a kid I watched these movies religiously. It was all about some Marty Mcfly and the Doc. I know that critically speaking this one is sub-par to the first one, but damnit I don't care. It let you be a cowboy, and all little boys want to be a cowboy whether they admit it or not.
